I am not sure if this is an entirely new trend when it comes to self-care, but it seems there is more out there about it than ever before. Perhaps it is the newest development of people being "life coaches" or leading podcasts, blogs, social media groups, accountability groups, book study groups, and so on. All of which is good and especially at the turn of the new year. Remember the handy dandy New Year's Resolution!
This year I will get into shape. I will eat a healthier diet. I will get more sleep. I will make more time for myself. I will dive into more do-it-yourself projects. I will read more books. I will cut down on sugar. I will cut out bad words. I will build on positive self-talk. I will keep up my flowerbeds. I will tone up my waistline. I will take my vitamins. I will meditate on all the things I will do at the turn of this new year. And I will not be so hard on myself when I fall asleep in front of Murder She Wrote at 11:30 p.m. with a bowl of ice cream by the couch.
In a recent session with a "health coach," I was told about the concept of habit stacking, and it made a great deal of sense to me.
It is like chipping away at the bad habits a bit at a time and adding on some good habits as you go a little bit at a time.
It does seem less overwhelming and doable. You can start by walking one mile a day and adding on from there. Cutting out one additional snack a day and taking a couple extra supplements.
Trying this approach for the past five months I have lost a slow 10 pounds, built in a round of vitamins, consistently walk at least two to three times a week and eat fast food no more than once a week. Doesn't sound like huge progress, but I am not starting out with a bang and then a fizzle!
It is not a quick fix. It is a steady reminder of showing up. In fact, if I charted it out it would look like the flight pattern of a housefly, but I keep moving in the right direction. And I think what has made this "early new year's shift" is based on five things this coach talks about in her podcast. Of course, our diet and exercise are in the top two self-help focuses when trying to whip things into shape. But as strange as it may seem these are two of the easiest.
After listening to multiple podcasts and reading up on ways to make the second half of life more meaningful, our spiritual walk is the most important, and often the most difficult to protect.
The fourth suggestion is also pretty tough because it deals with how you spend your time. Being intentional with your time. Making the most of your time. Saying no when you need to say no to others and yes when you need to say yes to yourself. For middle-aged women that can almost feel foreign.
It was, however, the fifth suggestion that left me stumped for some time, and I still struggle with this. This coach suggested we find our passion. Midlife somehow misplaces passion with survival. We make our lists, set the alarm, move from point a to point b to point c and grovel with frustration because this ended up taking three hours longer than expected because we no longer move as quickly as we once did.
She compares your passion to those things that once made you super excited growing up. Learning something new, starting a new sport, taking a trip, creating a new hobby.
And once you have homed in on all of the above, neatly or sloppily stack it into your daily habits and routines. It is certainly worth a few more podcasts, and more reasonable than declaring an overnight resolution to make something happen with no plan whatsoever.
So, Happy New Years and let us stack away!
