So, my husband and our neighbor Wayne are mounting our new 65 inch television set that I didn’t even ask for but was informed it was my Christmas and birthday gift.
And once it is up and looking great, getting it running was not so easy. Gone are the days of plugging it in. And gone are the days of me being a teenager rolling my eyes at my parents because they could not get the simple twisting in of two wires to make the VCR work on the television. My educated husband and very intelligent ex-marine neighbor were scratching their heads.
It was then that little 14 year old Allie asked to borrow my phone. I gave it to her and within a matter of moments playing with my phone and two remotes that I call “clickers”, we had action. And we three grown adults are trading puzzled looks as to how my phone could have done this. And then she says, “Oh, Ms. Callie, I wanted you to hear this song.” And she taps around on my phone and this video pops up on the TV that isn’t even a regular channel.
And I asked her how she did this, and she said my phone did it with a Vizio app she downloaded. And while my phone is sending this video to my enormous unasked for gift, the phone rings and I answer and continue to talk. How? Ok, I had every right to get impatient as a teenager; it was two visible cords, not magic!!!!
The next day my friend and I are in Baton Rouge to bring some things to my son. I call him for directions and he sighs and says, “Mom, I dropped you a pin in a text a couple of weeks ago. Remember?” And I remembered and followed his step by step directions to get the phone on speaker and find the pin and tap on something and sure enough, this lady starts talking to me and telling me where I am and need to go.
And I am trying to explain this to my friend who is as confused as I am, but apparently not as blown away because all she wants to tell me is how I need to change this lady’s voice to a sexy male Australian voice. And I’m trying to drive in traffic and listen to this woman while my friend gets her phone and before I know it there are no longer two people in my car but four. Me, her, one woman with a midwestern accent and a sexy Australian guy.
And she is telling me this is the guy I need to have in my phone to talk to and the whole time I’m thinking neither of these people are real, but I really do kind of want that Australian guy on my phone instead, because nothing is really real anymore especially the cords from my IPhone that make a 65 inch-not-a-gift-I-asked-for television become your own personal entertainment center.
It was just two cords. One went from the TV to the VCR and the other went from VCR to the TV, I think, but they were real and you held them and you just plugged in everywhere you could find a place until the thing worked. But, you are reading the words of a lady who has yet to master the “clicker.” Remote controls once had an off and on switch, another for volume, and then the channel changer. Now I believe you could do brain surgery with one and if it does not quite complete the task just grab the local 14 year old and a charged cell phone with apps and get rolling. And while you’re at it the sexy Australian guy can hang around just for kicks.
Can someone please just pass me a good book. One with actual pages. I won’t even mind a little bit of dust, but something tells me the sexy Australian guy could probably read that to me out loud as well. I agree, Grandma! What’s the world coming to?
