As any mother of children will attest, there is no such thing as a relaxing vacation. There is Operation Vacation that requires days --- sometimes months --- of planning and saving up. These days it can consist of what VIP tickets need to be purchased, what menus need to be planned, or what travel arrangements are required. As much as times have changed, one thing that has not changed is the need for every mother to require a vacation from the vacation once the bags are plopped back down in the bedrooms back at home.
I remember so well the multiple trips we made with the four boys up to the mountains and then down to the beach. Both destinations were equally exciting and eventful and harrowing for a mom. One required extra jackets, lots of bug spray, fireside treats, and sleeping bags. The other required lots of sunscreen, beach snacks, and towels. And no matter how well planned out the trip was, there was still an overwhelming amount of expense and last minute spending for the children's Tylenol, forgotten tennis shoes, bottles of water, and toiletries.
It did not take a mom long to figure out the best trips needed a condominium or a cabin stocked with a washer and dryer, refrigerator, oven and stove, more than one bathroom, and extra room to sprawl out. It only took us a couple of attempts with tents or hotel rooms to accept even the nicest of facilities still require work, so trying to rough it was not worth the tiny bit of savings.
And of course, the greatest reason for this luxury was so that mom could wash all the clothes and refold them neatly before departure, dump the extra groceries, make the fresh sandwiches for the road trip home and organize for the arrival home so the days of recuperation it would take for the mom would not be interrupted by bags of dirty clothes and stale food.
It is for this reason my husband and I kind of shied away from vacations once the boys were all grown. There was no real connection to relaxation. Quickly becoming creatures of habit, why would we need to go to the mountains or the beach when just a weekend in the city took care of the itch? And then we both discovered, the trip without kids is another world experience.
My first trip to the beach with friends I spent the first day thinking I was forgetting something. Oh yes, the stress! No children swimming out too far, no jellyfish stings, no sunburns or “I'm bored”. There was just sand and waves and salty air and no need to get up to go make lunch.
In fact, for the first time in my whole adult life I realized that a vacation was meant to be just that. It was a vacation. A get away. And when I got home I was refreshed and relaxed and even felt like hitting the gym after seeing women in bathing suits. And I had the extra energy to do it! My husband agrees and says it is the same way when he goes to his hunting camp, but he always went to the hunting camp... so try again. I now completely understand what it means to say "a girl's trip" as I sit perched in my own bedroom as waves crash outside my window, and I write this column. And then I go home to a clean house to prepare for our Christmas celebrations.
Clay and I know these days are fleeting. With grandchildren sprouting up, those crazy vacations are just on the horizon as we drag out the tents and towels, but the one added perk to getting older and having put in your time is packing up the parents. That's right. Go pack the picnic lunch adult children. Grandma's gonna be at the pool.
