When I was a teenager there were many things I told myself I would never do when I got older.
There is something about being a teenager that makes anybody over 30 equivalent to 75. This was a time moving toward the turn of a new millennium. People were building up layers of superstitions as to what would happen when the unbelievable year 2000 arrived. I would count on my fingers and think, "Oh, I will be 33 years old by then. I will be so old none of those bad things will even matter. Thank goodness 55 is the new 35 because at one point 35 was ancient.
I remember being told in a history class in college the life expectancy in the 1600's was 30, and I thought that seemed about right. People in their middle ages did strange things I was not going to do. I was not going to repeat myself a lot. I was not going to call somebody by ten different names before I got their name right. I was not going to drink Tab instead of Dr. Pepper. I was not going to have "stuff" all over my car, or pack around a bag of medication, or carry a suitcase for a purse.
Well, life has taught me that 35 might as well be 55 because these things I told myself I would not do became inevitable as time marched on. And there are valid reasons why a teenager would not need to do these things. They are young and ignorant of life with multitudes of responsibilities stacked on top of one another. Responsibilities like being able to live past middle age. Having bottled water in the SUV to take the vitamins throughout the day and packs of crackers when the blood sugar drops which is a real thing.
We keep chocolate for the caffeine headache and gum to go with the diet drink to curb snacking because once you are no longer a teenager walking past the bakery section in the grocery store puts weight on you. It's like the sugar passes through the nostrils.
And we go through a random list of names to retrieve one because once we have reached a certain age there are a lot of names we have committed to and eventually the right one will pop up.
My top ten thing I would not do was to carry around a suitcase for a purse. In fact, growing up I refused to even use a purse. Well, an adult woman cannot survive without the purse that grows with each decade. When the boys were in the pre-teen years we were shopping for shoes. The man at the counter said the woman with the heaviest purse won 30% off on the next purchase. Before my aging brain could think my boys said, "Mom, go!"
I walked up to the front and handed them my black rectangular bag that weighed 10 pounds. And my happy middle-aged self took that discount with a smile from ear to ear, forgetting the rolling eyes that would be happening in my head at 16 years old. My sons were not mortified because within that purse was first aid, gum, snacks, paper money, credit cards, safety pins, bobby pins, writing pens. A checkbook, medicine prescriptions, coupons, bug bite cream, and sunscreen just to name a few. Boy teenagers didn't mind that mom carried a suitcase because dads only carried a wallet. The paradigm shifts within our mindset as we age.
Yes, I now pack around my suitcase equipped with medication, supplements, a breakfast bar and Diet Coke, mints, gum, and insurance cards. And I do this with pride as a responsible older lady who when looking back at her teenage years can create a list pages long of things I would never do when I was a teenager if I went back.
Oh, well. Live and learn. Ignorance was bliss and with age comes wisdom even if when addressing a grandchild we get the name right after five others, a couple even being the names of our pets.
