It was ten years ago when I first made Sally Green's acquaintance. Her grandson Erik and my daughter Betsy were courting, having met in medical school. When she and her husband Dr. Milton Green came to town, we gathered with the Green family for dinner at the Upperline, and really, that was that. Rodney regaled Dr. Milt with tractor talk. Intrigued, he inquired, "Who's got a tractor?" And I was smitten with Sally from the start. Fortunately for me, by all accounts the feeling was mutual.
She and I found friendship, in one another. A relationship that was to last - Erik and Betsy soon became engaged and were married at the Royal Orleans in 2018. At the wedding, where many met Sally, she seemed tickled with the tussie mussie I had for her to carry. And with "Mustang Sally" which I had the band play - she and Milt danced up a storm. Post-wedding, a pretty coffee table book, "Tussie-Mussies The Victorian Art of Expressing Yourself in the Language of Flowers" by Geraldine Adamich Laufer appeared. Seeing that her friend in Michigan had one, Sally said I had to have a copy. Our camaraderie endured with phone calls and visits and trips. We made it our business to stay in touch and converse. Sally often said, "From your lips to God's ears."
When we first met, she and Dr. Milt - a retired orthopedic surgeon - lived in West Bloomfield, Michigan, where they had raised their beautiful family: Danny, our son-in-law Erik's dad who is also a retired orthopedic surgeon - like father, like son, and his siblings Jonathan, Nancy, and Amy. But already contemplating a move, Sally and Dr. Milt relocated, lickety-split, to their home in West Palm Beach, Florida, where they had wintered for years. It was there that they hosted my daughter Betsy and her betrothed Erik on multiple occasions.
Sally Garfinkle was born in 1932 in Chicago where she grew up with her baby brother Ronnie in a loving family. For a milestone birthday, her devoted children arranged a delightful return to the Windy City with a tour of places that were significant in her life. It was one of Sally's fondest memories that she shared with me. And as it turns out, one of those places - Garfinkle's Fine Jewelry in Highland Park - also holds special meaning for Betsy. A fine jewelry store, owned by Sally's family, it was from Garfinkle's that Erik selected Betsy's beautiful engagement ring. I always felt that Sally, who was vivacious and witty, sparkled just like that diamond.
We hosted Sally and Milt Green, together with their son Danny and daughter-in-law Riki, at our home on the north shore several times in the years since. From dinners at our home to brunch on the Mandeville lakefront, those were magical times. Sally was a most gracious guest, sending magnificent flowers. She exuded kindness. And she also taught us to cut cake. Interestingly, in a room full of surgeons, Sally knew a superior way to cut. It was perfect.
If I have one regret, other than not sampling her famous Garfinkle brownies, it is that I didn't take copious notes as Sally unspooled the stories. We spent much of Labor Day weekend - the fabulous Jazz weekend organized by her daughter-in-law Nancy Green at the Grand Hotel on Mackinac Island - together in 2019. Timing is everything. And as the music played, Sally entertained me with stories of her youth; her family in Kentucky and Europe; and meeting Milt at a resort where their respective families were vacationing. It was coup de foudre.
A University of Michigan graduate, Sally so enjoyed their early years. Milt was in Medical School at the University of Michigan where they made wonderful, lifelong friends. How happy they were! Just like my own parents, they packed a little canteen with coffee for road trips. But Milt and Sally may have well been on their way to see The Highwaymen. Danny disclosed that his parents saw them many times. Apparently, Sally was a big Willie Nelson fan.
Meanwhile, the Green family was growing. It was felicity, all around, as their four cherished children were born. Then, later, they were joined by spouses - Dr. Ulrika "Riki" Birgersdotter-Green (Dr. Danny), Nancy (Jonathan), Mitch Robins (Amy), and Martin Schreiber (Dr. Nancy). Then, the passel of grandchildren - Erik, Anna, and Nils Green; Andrew Green and Dan Stocker; and Emily, Alex, and Sean Robins - and great-grandchildren, to whom Sally and Milt were devoted, arrived. To my knowledge, Sally and Dr. Milt - exceptional grandparents - never missed a graduation of a grandchild. I can say with certitude that they were front and center at Erik -- a fourth-generation physician in the Green family - and Betsy's commencement at Tulane School of Medicine in 2017.
But back to Sally, she never missed a beat, for ninety-two years. Small in stature, she was big in spirit. And she made not only Betsy, but also me, feel most welcome. Embraced like family, I received encouragement from Sally in all my endeavors. "Go now, and enjoy," she would say.
In the autumn of life, she and Milt relocated to San Diego - sweater weather - to be near daughter Amy and son Danny who, together with daughter Nancy and son Jon, and their spouses, were dedicated to their parents. Sally was most grateful for her family, something she never failed to mention. After Milt's unexpected passing in 2021, at the age of ninety, she was sagely positioned near family. And taking the helm, they took the best of care of their beloved mother, with failing eyesight. Yet, sharp as a tack, she and I continued our phone visits as the years flew by. It's always later than we think. Sally passed peacefully away on the twenty-second day of September, just shy of her 93rd birthday. I had tried to reach her just a few weeks prior, but regrettably I was too late. Time waits for no one.
I take great consolation in knowing that my precious, little grandson Lukas Karl Cecil Green met his Great-Grandma Sally last summer, on his first trip to his paternal grandparents' home in La Jolla, California. That was a very important meeting - an impressionable seven-month-old and his beloved great-grandmother, a great lady in her own right. My hope is that Lukas will take after her - she was kind, loving, generous, and faithful. And happy in life.
My son-in-law's grandmother and daughter's grandmother-in-law - Sally Garfinkle Green - led a charmed life, one filled with joy and love. Ninety-two wonderful years. How grateful I am that I met Sally. Her memory is a blessing.
